One of the things I love to tell people, is that it is very important to know their “why.” It is very important to know why you do what you do. Recently I watched the TED talk by Simon Sinek about starting with your why. So In that spirit I decided I must tell you about my why. Simply put, my “why” lies in my belief in personal responsibility. I believe that if everyone takes responsibility to create the life they want, it would be of great benefit to everyone. I believe that no matter who you are, what challenges you face, or how big you dream; you have the ability to make a success of your life. It is due to this belief that I became a life coach. It hurts when I see people give up due to a bad self esteem, or when people give up in the face of seemingly insurmountable challenges. I get sad when people are told their dreams are too big, so they should just give up already. I get frustrated when people expect others (whether it’s their spouse or the government) to make their problems go away or make them happy. However, when people accept themselves, face their challenges, dream big, and create success stories; I get a warm feeling in my heart. That is why I help people to do exactly that. Let me explain a little bit more:
No matter who you are
I deeply believe that each of us has been created to be a unique individual with the capability of making a good and special impact on the world. However, every one of us is different from the person we are meant to be, we are different from our true selves. Therefore the impact we have on the world isn’t always as good and special as it is supposed to be. We sometimes end up being generic or hurtful in stead of unique and valuable. This means that each of us has the responsibility to take control of our impact to make sure it is good and unique. I help people do this by helping them to discover who they truly are, and who they were created to be. In that way my clients can see what impact they should make and how to get to the point of making that impact.
No matter what challenges you face
Each of us faces challenges in some form or another. It might be sickness, an unsupportive family, poverty, ADHD, dyslexia, a difficult employer, lazy employees, or maybe even a mood disorder. I am sure I can list many more challenges, but that’s not the point. The point is that each of us faces challenges. We can make some challenges go away, but some of these challenges will stay with us for the rest of our lives, no matter what we do. These challenges impose a direct threat to our freedom. True freedom is when you can do what you want, but our challenges prevent us from doing what we want. For example: ADHD won’t allow you to focus on one thing for too long (trust me, I know). So the question, is how can you increase your freedom? Well, either you make the challenge go away, if you can, or you find a way around it, if you can’t make it go away. In my coaching I help people know the difference between the challenges they can solve, and the challenges that need a workaround. Then I also help my clients to strategise and implement the right course of action. In this way I can help you maximise your freedom.
No matter how big you dream
Some people dream of owning big houses, fast cars or private jets. There is nothing wrong with these dreams, and if you dream of those things, power to you. However, some people also have noble dreams, and these dreams can be of any size. People like Martin Luther King and Nelson Mandela had huge dreams, but there are millions of people with smaller dreams. Nurses dream of hopeless patients making a comeback, engineers dream of solving complex problems, accountants believe in helping businesses get their finances in order, sales people dream of striking deals that are beneficial to both them and the client. I can go on, but I hope you get the gist. In a way, your dream is your why. Your dream is what gives meaning to your life. I dream of a world where everyone takes the responsibility to be the change they want to see. What’s your dream? Maybe you don’t know yet, but when you know, you will live a meaningful life. Talk to your coach about it 🙂
You can have a successful life
Notice how I say: “you can have a successful life,” instead of “you can make your dream come true.” Of course, in a ideal world, all of our dreams will come true, but this world isn’t ideal. Despite MLK’s dream, people are still judged based on race rather than the content of their character. Despite Nelson Mandela’s dream, racism is still a problem in South Africa. Nurses lose patients, engineers get stumped, business owners don’t always listen to their accountants, and sales people sometimes have to chase shady deals. So if success isn’t your dreams coming true, then what is it? Is it power, money, fame or happiness. No, those things are nice, but they are fleeting, they come and go. So then what? Well, I think success is discovering who you are and taking control of your impact; success is acknowledging your challenges and navigating around them with freedom; success is about knowing your dream and allowing it to create meaning in your life. Then the rewards of success may follow, power, money, fame, or happiness. Maybe it won’t follow, but a life of impact, freedom, and meaning is worth any sacrifice.
No matter who you are, no matter what challenges you face, no matter how big your dream; you can create a successful life.